Your Score: Edward D. Wood, Jr.
Your film will be 51% romantic, 33% comedy, 33% complex plot, and a $ 35 million budget.
Ed Wood will get your film done waaaaay under budget, and will likely make it into a classic film of all time -- for all the wrong reasons. Let's face it, your life isn't terribly exciting to begin with, and it needs some camping up. His resume includes classics such as Plan Nine From Outer Space and Glen or Glenda? He's not afraid to tackle controversial topics, and may insist on portraying a transvestite in your film -- even if you've never seen a transvestite before. He was immortalized in the Academy Award winning Tim Burton film, Ed Wood -- go see it.
| Link: The Director Who Films Your Life Test written by bingomosquito on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test View My Profile(bingomosquito) |
Dammit, I wanted to get Roger Corman. Although only because Alejandro Jodorowsky wasn't one of the options (trailer for Jodorowsky's "The Holy Mountain" on YouTube).
Much as I hate to add to the preponderance of cat humour on the net, this is brilliant.
As indicated by the link at left, I have long maintained that the Clone Wars animated cartoons produced by Genndy Tartakovsky and his unit at Cartoon Network Studios are by far the best material to be generated by Lucasfilm's largely mishandled run of Star Wars prequels.
Among the many criticisms that can be levelled at George Lucas' second bite at his main cash cow (I once called him a "one trick pony"; unfair, he has two tricks), detailing the manner in which they all but entirely undermine the goodwill generated by the first trilogy, for me the biggest remains the way in which the definitive, crucial relationship between the two principal protagonists (and the transformation of one into an antagonist) is botched.
This is partly due to miscasting but largely due to problems with story structure. Watched in production order, the viewer's greatest expectation of Episodes I-III is surely seeing the great friendship between Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker maturing against the waning days of the Jedi Knights and the specifics of Skywalker's betrayal and his rebirth as Darth Vader. Yet the two characters share virtually no screen time in the first film, and in any case are separated by a disconcertingly large age gap. In the second, the better part of a decade has elapsed and we find Skywalker churlish and resentful of Kenobi and events soon conspire to separate them anyway. In the third, they are once again spilt from one another and when they meet again it is for the first time as full-blown adversaries. Anakin's whiny, passive and rapid switch to the "dark side" is thus devoid of dramatic weight and for all the emoting the actors attempt their fight to the finish seems desultory at best. There is a sense of doom about the events onscreen, but only because we know they must happen because later stories have told us so. It is impossible to reconcile the brief, stiff and unnatural interaction demonstrated with the abiding friendship so fondly remembered by "Ben" Kenobi.
It is this deficit that the Clone Wars series, and the second in particular, helped to redress. Therein, the two characters fight side by side largely free of angst, recrimination or scratchy-voiced loggerheads. Taking those few elements that do work from Eps I-III, ignoring pretty much everything else and applying the trademark design sense and flair for visual storytelling of the Tartakovsky team, the results only underlined George Lucas' inadequacies as a director and keen-mindedness as a multimedia producer yet further. Now Lucas has, as is his wont, returned to the well. Having used the previous micro-cartoons to serve as "Episodes 2.5", Lucas now expands the window yet further with a maxi-series of cgi cartoons that, despite being apparently open-ended, must all take place within a very few months of narrative chronology as demarcated by the already existing and canonical animation.
The first few episodes of said series are being released theatrically as the above feature film. As far as I am aware, this has only happened once before, about fifteen years ago when Bruce Timm and company's Batman: Mask of the Phantasm was unexpectedly bumped from a dtv production to a theatrical release by Warner Bros. while the work itself was already well underway. It shows; the budget had to be stretched beyond breaking point and the film does not stand up to rigours of full-blown cinematic presentation (although it is still exponentially more intelligent, absorbing and entertaining than the Schumacher horrors that followed). Cobbling together several television episodes, regardless of how polished and and well-produced, is not the way to make a movie (just ask the MST3K crew). Furthermore, I would suggest that adopting a visual style developed specifically for self-consciously "designy" 2D animation is not the way to make a 3D animated film. The result is inorganic characters that appear sculpted rather than grown; based on the trailer, the is film looks like nothing so much as a mega-budgeted episode of Robot Chicken...
The latest nugget of toe-curling footage added to the pile of public indictments of the man's character is actually an archive piece that is bound to become a viral mainstay for many days to come (YTMND, I'm looking at you). It's been blindingly obvious for several years that O'Reilly has a shorter fuse than Yosemite Sam, but I used to think it came with the general grumpiness of middle age. It seems that in his youth the man was to broadcast news what David O. Russell is to film-making today.
If you haven't seen them, please do ensure you watch both to the very end. And now, to play us out...
This one's for anyone who like maps *and* laughing at right-wing lunatics.
A racist, Arab and Muslim-baiting blog calling itself Gates Of Vienna (a reference to the attempted invasions of Europe carried out by the Ottoman Empire in 1529 and 1683) posted a map of what "Eurabia" (seriously, these people use language like that) might look like later this century.
The map was reposted here, and some of the comments are brilliant.
"SERIOUSLY PEOPLE, HOW ARE THE MUSLIMS GOING TO TAKE OVER ICELAND?"
"I think America will be called al-Bundy."
"Oh, Switzerland, won’t you EVER just pick a side?!"
As an aside, note the (probably at least semi-serious) place names, including a number of puns based around the Arabic prefix "al-" (although they managed to miss out al-Bania). This is one of the very few jokes the neocon-blogger crowd have, and they kick the arse out of it something rotten. I cringe whenever I see The Guardian newspaper referred to as "al-Grauniad", although that's less to do with the prefix and more to do with them keeping that ancient Barry-Cryer-when-he-still-had-brown-hair-e
Also, when colouring the map in green (see, they know green is the Islamic colour - they're dead clever, these neocons) they couldn't even be arsed to rub out national boundaries, suggesting that the Islamic Caliphate of Northern Ireland (al-Ster?) will remain separate from the other 26 counties. "Are you a Catholic Muslim Fundamentalist or a Protestant Muslim Fundamentalist?".
Suddenly Libertarians don't seem quite so bad.
Not recommended if you have a fatal aversion to minimalist orchestral music and/or time-lapse photography.
http://tinyurl.com/5f838y
If you want to know what the hell I'm on about, go here first.
According to the Illustrators' Partnership of America's Brad Holland, Jaszi, his colleagues and students are the authors behind a bill currently before the United States Congress and Senate, attempting- not for the first time- to address the problem of "orphan works". These are pieces of intellectual property that, for one reason or another, cannot be attributed to a copyright holder. Therefore they are often unused (particularly in research and education) for fear of infringing upon the rights of some unknown party. No one wants to find themselves liable for misuse of a photo that it later turns out belongs to Paul Getty.
Many American creatives contend that this bill, if enacted as law, will remove the inherent, immediate and exclusive copyright protection from all intellectual property. In-principle protection from infringement will no longer apply from the moment of creation; instead, any and all work will have to be registered with corporate-ran databases at an as yet unknown cost. Of course, this penalises the individual artist who is least able to pay (average earnings for a visual artist in Scotland: £4-5,000) and benefits aggressive and unscrupulous corporate raiders of a mind to gather and misuse any unregistered photos, drawings, music, films, stories or essays. Of course, a cheaper alternative would be to not put work in harm's way by disseminating it; in other words, don't have a career. The article above asks whether this bill amounts to a violation of international law. If it does, it'd hardly be the first time the US's conduct flew in the face of the world's judgement, but even if it it doesn't it remains a signal violation of creative rights.
The IPA has prepared a document that explains why this development should be of concern to creative people globally, as the new law would make it just as easy for an American-based crook to "orphan" a European, African, Asian or South American artist's work as a domestic's. In the age of the blogosphere, anyone or everyone with a mildly creative bent is spewing pretty much every idea they have into the public domain with little or no understanding of where they stand legally. Thankfully, there currently exist rules that govern the use of such material, but it appears this legislation could drive a hole right through the middle of the statute book.
Therefore I encourage you to read, but more importantly print, sign and send this letter to the relevant parties and tell everyone you know about it too.
Note that one can be put on this new database for alleged (and therefore unproven) misconduct. And while the legal safeguards of DPA might apply, no one is informed when they're put on it - you can't demand alteration of a record you don't know exists. A bloke from the company who provide this system sez: "Theft in the workplace hurts staff as much as employers because it puts everyone under suspicion", which is interesting when you remember that anyone "under suspicion" can go on to the database. Maybe we're all supposed to spy on our colleagues and report their pencil-stealing and websurfing-instead-of-work activities to save our own necks? It's reminiscent of [Godwin deleted]
The class war continues apace (although I suppose it's not really a war if only one side fight, while the other side do nothing).
This blog doesn't have enough pictures, so here are 25 icon-sized images I haven't used.
As anyone who has even skimmed this blog will know, I hate Libertarians. Permanently teenage, smart-arsed little computer programmers who read Ayn Rand and reckon that their tough, Marlboro Man individualism would make them rise to the top in the completely deregulated and privatised society they crave - but who, in reality, would be crying for their mothers after two days without internet access and Diet Coke.
The single most disingenuous act I've ever witnessed a human being commit occurred when one of these types - a self-proclaimed "anarcho-capitalist" no less - tried to argue that taxing consumption (via VAT) was fairer than taxing income because the fraud opportunities offered by VAT were more egalitarian. He argued that rich people with good accountants can fiddle their income tax down to pennies, while PAYE plebs like us are unable to. VAT, he reckoned, allowed everyone a go at cheating the system - as an example, he suggested "employing a cash-in-hand tradesman".
Now, ignoring the fact that he attempted to disguise his fervent, ideological belief in regressive taxation by dressing it up as some kind of everyman, common-sense pragmatism, his argument is still total baw. I have, myself, paid for work done on my house cash-in-hand, but the amount HMRC lost out on was pretty small. Meanwhile, big business systematically defrauds the government on VAT by massive amounts. And what of those of us who aren't getting new kitchens fitted or new extensions built? The tradesman argument assumes we all can and do employ accommodating workies on a regular basis. As for the income tax argument, I'm so into this idea, and not just because "Scandinavians do it, so it must be good". For the record, I'm not an Income Tax fetishist - I'd far rather the taxman concentrated on unearned, rather than earned income (inheritances, interest on savings, share dividends and "Capital Gains" are all taxed at lower rates than salaries) - but I honestly think basing people's contribution to the running of the country on ability to pay is A Good Idea.
What I've never got is why this "shift the tax burden almost entirely on to the poor" attitude should be so popular with people who're not particularly well off themselves. I can see why, say, Donald Trump, would be in favour of raising all tax revenue from the purchasing of "luxury goods" like clothes, shoes and heating. He, after all, wipes his arse with high-denomination banknotes, and couldn't possibly spend as fast as he earns. But why should some IT monkey who doesn't earn much more than me (I've been a computer programmer, and it doesn't pay *that* well), possessed of an almost creepy obsession with personal wealth, be a cheerleader for a system that will impoverish them? Free market fundamentalism is as bonkers as all the other types.
My childishness knows no bounds. I've just sniggered like an idiot on reading the headline "Ireland appoint Kidney as coach".
I also chortled a bit when I found out that, in 1982, the Zimbabwean Government passed a law making it a criminal offence to make jokes about the name of the head of state, President Banana.
If you want real last-gasp punnery, you could comment on the Special Relationship by suggesting that "Brown and Bush" is the Bad Lieutenant's idea of a good night out.
Seriously though - if I discovered that, say, Austria, had elected a President called Koch-Schmoker, I'd probably require medical attention.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dG42S_Pm
Though now, I've started to observe the same occurance in the most user/family friendly of games. It's only a matter of time before Mario Kart Wii related homicide stories appear. If you thought guys getting stabbed and maced in Gamestops/Gamestations over the much lauded but seriously overrated GTA IV was bad, let me break down an exchange I had with Ross today.
"I think my favourite part was all the fan service they did, like the Mario Galaxy themed Rainbow Road being a prime example"
"I think my favourite part was when you got hit with the blue shell before you crossed the finish line, you threw the controller to the ground yelling "WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT" and the clerk wanted to kick your ass."
"That doesn't count."
Though I see his point. Contrary to what Nintendo USA CEO Reggie Fils-Aimé says, "More players" doesn't necessarily equate "more fun". In fact, it comes off as a huge clusterfuck of Koopa shells, lightning bolts, more shells, banana peels, more shells, and the usual "the rules don't apply to the CPU characters" mantra where instead of feeling challenged by being in first place, it just comes off as a punishment. An unrelenting and infuriating bum slamming without the minor psychological panacea that eventually it'll be your turn to be the pitcher.
Still, I'm sold... with friends it's a lot of fun and about 100% times less deviant. I recommend giving it a go. Now all I have to do is wait for the launch of Wiiware so I can play the new Strong Bad games.
The flawed but useful Political Compass website rates the UK as one of the three most right-wing countries in the EU, along with socially conservative Greece and ultra-Catholic Poland. If you're interested (or even still reading), Sweden is allegedly the most left-wing, but only because the even more right-on Norway is so progressive, it refuses to join the EU at all.
While Britain as a whole is pretty far-right, England, as much as it exists as a country within the UK, seems particularly determined to become the most mean-spirited, knee-jerk, self-interested, greedy, intolerant, uncompassionate, I'm-all-right-Jack region in Europe, if not the World. I honestly believe you'll find more warmth and human kindness in large swathes of Jesusland (Bush-voting USA) than you will in, say, the Home Counties.
I've said before that London is a place of its own, and not strictly English, and I had always thought of it as being outside this trend, along with the similarly devolved Scotland and Wales (Northern Ireland is a special case, and I'm not starting on that at this time of night). While none are beacons of Social Democracy, let alone Socialism, there is some evidence that they're not quite as keen to become uber-capitalist dog-eat-dog dystopias. Consequently, what I find most upsetting about BoJo's election as Mayor (and the presence of the BNP on the London assembly) is that it suggests London is siding with the rest of England, rather than with its devolved cousins.
Weirdly, I was in London when the mayoral result was announced, on unrelated business. I spent a fair bit of Saturday wandering around the Tate Modern, where I realised an ambition by experiencing Joseph Beuys' "The Pack" first hand. That evening, I went for a curry on Brick Lane. On Sunday, I took a bus through the East End (Hackney actually looks quite nice, although Dalston seems a bit of a dump) before ending up in Highbury which, ironically enough, was full of Scousers (I sat in a pub a few minutes from the Emirates Stadium, and watched a singularly boring game of football between Arsenal and Everton on the telly). I'm sure all these things will still be possible after Teh_Legernd has done a bit of Mayoring, but this election is yet another sign that Britain's slide to the right continues apace and one more reason why I should think about emigrating.
Page Summary
![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
mcgazz : "Real life awaits us" [+7] - mcgazz : The whole "Rangers in Manchester" thing explained [+2]
- schism_schasm : Hairballs [+0]
- schism_schasm : Hard at work on those small, personal projects... [+0]
- schism_schasm : Like Ron Burgundy crossed with Ratso Rizzo [+2]
- mcgazz : Nutter alert! [+4]
- mcgazz : "If we dig precious things from the land, we will invite disaster." [+6]
- schism_schasm : Artist? Musician? Writer? Film-maker? Time to storm Capitol Hill! [+5]
- mcgazz : The clock struck thirteen [+4]
- mcgazz : 25 unused icons [+9]
- mcgazz : Money, Money, Money [+3]
- mcgazz : [insert 'offal' = 'awful' pun here] [+4]
- fracturedpope : Medical Observations [+0]
- mcgazz : It Was The Evening Standard Wot Won It [+12]
chasethestars